Are you someone who uses too many ums, errs and filler words in your communication?
A few here and there is natural, but too many can make you sound uncertain and lacking in confidence. It can also can make it difficult for your audience to receive your message.
For example, compare the following two examples:
Example One
Um… of course I… er…I’d be delighted to help. This is something I’m… um… really familiar with and… um…in fact it… um… comes up all the time so… er… I’m confident I can… um… resolve the er… problem for you.
Example Two
Of course I’d be delighted to help. This is something I’m really familiar with and in fact it comes up all the time, so I’m confident I can resolve the problem for you.
What did you notice? They are exactly the same words apart from the filler words in the first example, yet the second certainly sounds more believable and easy to understand than the first!
One of the questions I am asked frequently in my masterclasses and coaching sessions is how to stop the ums and errs; I think the two key ingredients are self-awareness and commitment - without them you won't have a chance of changing your habit.
To become more aware of how often you use filler words, record yourself speaking and listen back. You can also have it transcribed to include all the filler words - reading it back will definitely illuminate the problem, especially if you highlight them all!
Once you're aware and ready to commit to eliminating those unnecessary fillers, here are some ways to start changing your speech pattern:
🔺 Slow down your speech; don't be in a rush and really consider what you're saying
🔺 Embrace the pause, and especially if you feel an 'um' coming
🔺 Take a breath before answering someone (this is a good habit anyway as it allows you to consider what you're saying but also communicates that you are giving what you are saying some thought, and the pause portrays confidence)
🔺 Put an elastic band around your wrist and ping it every time you notice yourself umming or erring
🔺 Join an organisation like Toastmasters International where you have an opportunity to speak at every meeting and have someone counting and reporting on your fillers words, as well as pressing a buzzer every time you say one - a very quick way to become aware of just how big the problem is!
🔺 Get support from the people around you and ask them to help you notice when you're doing it (you could also consider something like a swear jar where you put £1 in for every um - you'll stop it pretty soon!)
Give these techniques a try and let me know how you get on. And if you have any additional tips, do share them in the comments!
Mel Sherwood is a Presentation Skills and Personal Impact Speaker, Founder of The RED Effect™ and Author of ‘The Authority Guide to Pitching Your Business: How to make an impact and be remembered - in under a minute!’ She works with ambitious business leaders, teams and individuals who want to express themselves with confidence, credibility and charisma. An Australian based in Scotland, Mel is an award-winning speaker, author and coach and combines over 25 years’ experience in business with a background as an actor, presenter and singer.